btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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