I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
