Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize