Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
