Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
