I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Hippo gnu deer
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize
