Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
This is my gift to your gina
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
