Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
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