today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
you will always have a special place in my vag
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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