# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
