I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina