I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
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