My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Randomize