I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
