thus making me awesome and them whores
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
