wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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