Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Randomize