I love black thongs
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Randomize
