How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
