she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
