You surviving the open bar?
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Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I am mentally ready for anal.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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