We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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