i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize