You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
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