These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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