why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
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