Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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