i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
