the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Randomize