Do you still have your period?
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
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