I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I'm at about main and main street
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
