OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Randomize
