how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
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