I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
