(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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