I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
The best revenge is premature balding
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
