i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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