even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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