plz talk dirty to me
i just found a plastic monkey in my sweatshirt pocket
Umm I had a plastic mermaid in my pants......
Really
You win
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize
