So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize