Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
My liver just had a heart attack.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
