stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
we're making bets on your personal life
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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