i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Are these your boobs on my camera?
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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