I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Randomize