He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
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