Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
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Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
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There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
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