Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize