it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
