Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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