I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
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